June 18, 2016 | (22) Comments

Many of us have moments indelibly etched in our minds from childhood. Moments that we remember as our fondest. And the faces or voices and feelings of those moments make such an impression on us that they inevitably shape who we become as adults. I remember such moments about my father, Bill Wallace.

Back in the 1950s, when I was growing up, my dad worked as the district sales manager for Cameron Iron Works, a company that produced oil-drilling supplies and parts for rigs and wells. I remember going to work many times with my dad, and even now, I often think about how he engaged with the people around him.

Dad was a great “people person,” and one of my favorite memories as a boy was at the Cameron plant where he was a manager. In the warehouse where he worked, there was an office up front, and at the back the employees produced the valves and equipment. Annually he’d clear out the back of the warehouse and put on a fish fry for the employees. All of the men worked together, bringing in huge fryers to cook fish and hush puppies and French fries. There would be 300 men or so at this annual event. It was festive and fun, and I remember the laughter, the jokes and the ribbing among them.

But what I remember most was my dad in the middle of it all. My dad, in his short-sleeve white shirt and tie and his Cameron pocket protector with the three pens, completely immersed himself in the crowd. He went from person to person shaking hands, acknowledging and thanking people and making sure everyone was having a great time.

I can remember watching him as a kid and thinking, “My dad is so good with people.” I saw how they responded to him, how he seemed to make them feel and how much they liked him. It made me feel good, and I was so proud of him. But that was just my dad’s way. He engaged with people that way every place that he was – at church, where he provided comfort to so many. And most importantly at home, where he was there for us always, leading and supporting us.

I admired him then with the eyes and simplicity of a child. But what I’ve come to appreciate since then was my dad’s ability to be so present for every moment and every person who was truly important to him. I have so many memories that revolve around my dad. I observed his treatment of others, and I learned his work ethic and morals. His viable presence influenced us as children and molded my brother and I as men. As a father, I understand his intentions and efforts and the importance of being present for my own children and grandchildren.

Often, when I consider the things that challenge our families and our greater society now, I can’t help but think about the incredible need for fathers. We have amazing fathers among us. Fathers who are present and loving and work hard for their families. But the reality is also that so, so many children do not grow up with the guiding hand and influence of a father in their lives.

I know all families today don’t look as many did decades ago when mom, dad and all their children lived under a single roof. Even I became a single dad when my children were still very young. But we define for our children what it means to be a family. We can make the choice to be present in their lives, to provide them with the love and support they deserve, to nurture their growth and shape their futures. No child should ever wonder, “Where’s dad?” No matter where dad is, we must always define a way to be there, making a positive impact on our children. It is one of the most tangible and worthy contributions we make as men.

Happy, blessed Father’s Day to all.

May 23, 2016 | (23) Comments

When you are immersed in one of the world’s largest and most prestigious medical centers, within one of the nation’s best and busiest children’s and women’s hospitals, one thing you might not ever expect to encounter is gossip. That’s because gossip, to most of us, is something that happens in a small town, in social clubs, in church … at high schools. But the truth of the matter is it happens everywhere, even here at Texas Children’s. And if we are not careful about what we share and with whom, we can easily find ourselves being a party to hurtful, destructive behavior.

Words have such incredible power, and negative words are particularly harmful. Gossip and rumors are so potent and often ruin reputations, friendships and families. Just as devastating are false, deceitful or unkind words in the workplace. They can create a toxic environment and greatly damage an organization, decreasing our focus and productivity and causing us to lose good staff and employees. There can even be legal ramifications if career-damaging gossip defames a person’s character or impacts their employability. Something that powerful deserves our close attention.

Dr. Ed Young, the pastor of Second Baptist Church, delivered a sermon – The Transparent Secret – a few years ago about this very thing. Dr. Young explained how speaking the right words at the right time is like “apples of gold and baskets of silver.” These positive words have soothing, healing powers. They diffuse situations, strengthen relationships and comfort people. However, the opposite is just as true when we speak the wrong words to the wrong people. Dr. Young called these words rotten apples.

“Rotten apples can upset an office. A rotten apple affects a home, a club, a church or any kind of group we’re in. It’s important that we do not speak rotten apples. However, some people have that habit. It’s ingrained in their lives and in their personalities. And all of us have areas of rottenness in our speech.”

He said those who are in the “rotten apple business” – whether on the internet or telephone, in the office or in the family – cause three deaths when they spread negativity: that of oneself, the person they’re sharing it with and the victim in the story, whether it’s true or not. Because we can sometimes even unintentionally be tempted to share information that quickly crosses the line into the arena of gossip, Dr. Young reminded us of this quick test. He said there are three things we should ask ourselves before we speak: Is it true? Is it kind? And is it necessary?

Let’s examine that a bit.

Is it true? Ever hear of that expression “too good to be true?” Well I think some things are too bad to be true. Too offensive to be true. Too unlike the normal character of the person in question to be true. And often when we hear false things about people, a voice within us refutes it. Yet, we listen anyway, and worse, we may repeat it. But is it true? Also, consider the source. Is the bit of information crossing your ears coming from someone who knows the inside scoop on everybody? How is that possible? It’s not, and chances are some, most or possibly all of what you are hearing is not accurate or being shared in the right context.

Is it kind? I admit it – some things we hear will be undeniably true. Maybe we have a firsthand account of the situation. Perhaps we observed it with our own eyes. But ask yourself, if the information that you have become privy to is unkind or unflattering to the affected person, should you repeat it? Almost always, the answer is no. The momentary relief or satisfaction one might get from sharing negative information can cause long-lasting or possibly irreparable damage to someone’s reputation and self-esteem. Our words are that powerful. Make sure they don’t perpetuate unkindness.

Is it necessary? This question is critical, because it often will place a hard stop on the flow of information that might have slipped past the first two questions. In fact, when assessing if something is necessary, Dr. Young challenged, “Are you saving a life? Are you protecting someone from abuse?” Chances are, much of what’s repeated often falls in neither category.

There are things we will know about others that are absolutely true. And we may consider our actions kind because we believe the intentions of our hearts are good. But even good intentions must be questioned to maintain the best interest of all those involved. Is there really any net gain for the greater good in sharing the information you know? Depending on the information and your relationship with the affected person, maybe what he or she deserves or actually needs is guidance, a listening ear or prayer to help get them onto a better path.

Giving and being our best selves means ridding ourselves of false or negative words … getting rid of those rotten apples, as Dr. Young calls them. Instead, he suggests, give golden apples. Golden apples give health and joy. If we are mindful, we can use golden apples – positive words and constructive actions – to make an impact that builds a relationship, lifts a team’s morale or strengthens the culture of an entire organization.

May 6, 2016 | (19) Comments

“A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform.”

This quote from Diane Mariechild, author of Mother Wit, is one I think of often when I walk the halls of our hospital. Throughout those halls, in children’s rooms, in the food court areas and in the waiting rooms, I see the mothers of the children for whom we are caring. I see them, some with concern on their faces and determination in their spirits. Others who are a well of hope and reassurance for their children. They are a constant reminder to me of the strength of mothers.

As we honor the many women in our lives on Sunday who are mothers or mother figures to so many, I am reminded of one woman in particular – Elizabeth DeLuca. Elizabeth is the mother of four daughters, including her precious Caroline who she lost on March 24 of this year.

Caroline was born with a rare neurodegenerative condition called STXBP1 (or Ohtahara Syndrome). Elizabeth remembers her as “a big strong healthy baby.” But after only one day home – “one day of normal,” as Elizabeth has described it – the lives of the DeLuca family would forever be changed. Caroline’s 18 years were filled with countless tests and treatments, and much of her life was spent here at Texas Children’s Hospital.

Elizabeth constantly researched neurodegenerative and neurotransmitter diseases and available treatments – she was such an informed, integral part of Caroline’s care team. However, she was also resolved that Caroline was not a diagnosis, and she was determined that Caroline’s life would be filled with much more than a list of limitations. She involved Caroline in church, sports and music and exposed her to Broadway shows – Mamma Mia was Caroline’s favorite.

Elizabeth was her daughter’s advocate, nurturer and most adamant cheerleader. She was more than Caroline’s mother, she was her champion. And when I think of her, I am in awe, just as I am so many times when I hear the stories of our patients and the mothers here with them.

Like Elizabeth, many of our patients’ moms have other children, and they are wives. Many have jobs or give of themselves in so many other areas of their lives. Yet, they also are here, ensuring their children have a voice, providing information they have researched and asking the critical questions that make all the difference in their children’s care and outcomes.

Mothers have within them a seemingly endless reservoir of strength and tenderness for their children. They are the full circle, and I’m so thankful for the opportunity to celebrate them on Sunday. But I especially appreciate and am inspired by our patients’ mothers every single day.

Happy, blessed Mother’s Day to all.

April 28, 2016 | (21) Comments

As we begin our days, whether at 7 a.m. or 7 p.m. in the medical center, at the West Campus or across the community, we arrive with the potential to impact the lives of thousands of children and women in our care.

Because we engage with so many families each day, we can sometimes take for granted how our daily interactions impact our patients’ and families’ lives. How we work and how we engage with our families today may affect a memory that lasts a lifetime.

Employees like Donald Wilkins take that notion to heart. Donald works with families in Ambulatory Surgery to keep them updated about their children’s status during surgery. For anxious parents awaiting a child’s status and needing a bit of reassurance, Donald is one of the most important people they’ll interact with at Texas Children’s. Even more important is Donald’s role in making sure the patient feels comfortable and confident about the procedure they’re about to undergo. On a recent “Caught You Caring” card, one patient wrote:

“Throughout my stay, one person has shined like a bright star in my eyes. I met him in the surgery waiting room – his name is Donald. He is an amazing person and has a one-of-a-kind personality. He made me very comfortable and made me feel safe pre-surgery. He checked on me often and made sure I felt ok. He came to visit me today and made me very happy. People like him make me want to go into the medical field and help children with chronic illnesses like me feel better. Thank you for all you do Donald. God bless you.”

This week, as we celebrate Patient Experience Week with hospitals nationwide, it’s important to remember that each of us has the potential to make a similar impact every day. And it’s important. Research even shows that when a family has a great experience, they listen more intently to their medical instructions and follow doctors’ orders more thoroughly. They’re readmitted to the hospital less often and have fewer return visits with the doctor when they feel comfortable enough to ask the right questions the first time around. It makes sense: how we make our families feel is an essential part of caregiving.

That’s why ensuring positive patient experiences isn’t something that’s just nice to do – it’s our priority at Texas Children’s, and really, it’s our promise to our families. Our patients know they can count on us for the best medical care. We want them to expect and receive an exceptional experience at Texas Children’s as well.

To this end, we are making concerted efforts to elevate the patient experience throughout our system. For instance, our leaders and their teams are conducting “intentional rounding” at the hospitals. In the Emergency Center, we changed our notification system to help families understand our process and the reason behind wait times. And in our clinics and practices, we armed employees with tips and ideas for creating positive memories with patients every day.

These are just some of the ways we are demonstrating our dedication to exceptional patient experiences for every patient and every family who comes to any part of Texas Children’s. We will continue to ask our patients about their experiences and listen for ways to improve.

So as you arrive tomorrow morning or evening, at one of our hospitals, clinics, practices or any Texas Children’s location, think about the potential in you to create an even better experience for everyone you encounter that day. Even if your role doesn’t involve direct patient care, you have the ability to encourage or support colleagues. That promotes team work and strengthens our sense of culture, and that absolutely impacts patient experience down the line.

It all matters to every single family we touch. So arrive each day, ready and excited for the wonderful opportunity you might have at any moment to make a difference.